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Prom Scandal

(Reported on day after Prom)

The economy continues to sputter along like a three-legged hippo. People are turning to extreme solutions to make ends meet. This past weekend, for example, strangers from all walks of life lined up around city blocks to buy a ticket for the biggest Mega Millions jackpot in history, a cool $640 million (well, probably closer to $4.95 after taxes).

Even at Academy, we’re making radical changes to improve efficiency. Just this year, we’ve eliminated the use of garbage cans in the cafeteria-along with lunch trays. Next year, expect cutlery to be gone. I’ve heard all entres will be finger food.

Unfortunately, even these drastic moves haven’t kept up with rising costs and a shrinking budget. The administration held a series of emergency meetings last  November, according to an administrative leak who sat in on these talks. This source, currently known only as “Slots” chose to meet me and come forward with the story.

It seems that during a stall in the talks, someone suggested using Prom, held on March 31st at The Ohio Theatre, as a vehicle for generating revenue, proposing the front of a “Casino Night” theme for the event, with blackjack, Hold ‘Em, roulette, and craps. Each participant would be given $15,000 in fake bills to cash in for chips.

“The one detail missing from that story is that when each student claims his/her money, the school is keeping track, and at the end of the night, charges of $15,000 will be made to each family’s account,” reveals S, who also provided me with sheets showing these transactions.

At least 300 kids attended Prom, though not all of the participated in the Casino Night events. Even with only 250 buying in that’s still $3.75 million.

“That would have been enough to pay for this year’s expenses and provide the seed capital to fund the new middle school’s construction. They were really milking this idea for all it was worth, and looking a few years down the road,” says S.

Now, it would have been highway robbery for the school to just take the money, so they had no choice but to allow students to cash in their chips for real cash at the very end of the night.

“Of course, they conveniently forgot to publicize this information, so all the high rollers just turned in their chips without trying to redeem anything,” summarized S rather savagely. “The plan worked to perfection. Everything was done by 11:45pm, and all the chips had been collected.”

Other than the felony level theft, the school would also be liable for promoting underage gambling, since there was real money involved. I, myself, have approached the police as well, and have been cooperating fully with them as go-between for S. An investigation is currently underway. Further coverage on this developing story is yet to come as more details are made available to me.

Written by Andy Li’13


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